May 5, 2017

Ooph. It sounds just like the noise my fat old cat used to make when he landed on the floor after jumping from much too great a height. Or what you might say at the end of a shitty day at work while you clink beer steins with a friend. It's also the beginning of "oopho...

April 4, 2017

This is by my beautiful student and friend Beth, who helped clear out my London flat today.

Flat is cleared out. Fuck you cancer. Fuck it. Love you Jessica Berson x 

Portobello - for JB.

So let's talk about ghosts 
And where they breathe and where they go- when...

April 1, 2017

Whoever came up with this bromide should be shot and then shot again the next day. How's that? Which day was which? We don't live life one day at a time, we live it in great big spoonfuls of tomorrows and yesterdays. What if in this precious one day your kids happen to...

March 26, 2017

A fellow Stage IV early mets person sent me this article, which allowed me my first night without a semi-panic attack I've had since being diagnosed. She had a similar experience with DCIS/stage IV, and a similar path with Tam, and the same sense of guilt. But if what...

March 24, 2017

The few weeks since my diagnosis have felt like the longest, roughest year. Maybe that's a good thing-- maybe time slowing down is just what I want. It's not just the word "terminal" and all that implies; it's hard to describe how every single aspect of life has been h...

March 24, 2017

I wrote this right before my mastectomy in 2013. It seems so crazy now that I cared at all about my breasts. Because really, if your breasts are trying to kill you, why would you want them clinging to your heart? 

Lifecycle of a boob

“Is your boob going to explode?”

...

March 22, 2017

In 2013, my very first mammogram found DCIS in my right breast-- Ductal Carcinoma in Situ. Not even real cancer, DCIS is considered a vague precancerous condition, and often never turns into cancer at all. I'm the sort of person who labored in childbirth for 66 hours t...

March 20, 2017

I started having pretty severe back pain coming home from ASTR in November, right before the election. Then, on my way to vote, I tripped on the beautifully maintained Roslindale sidewalk, and felt that dreaded tweak of muscle spasm that usually means some vertabrae pu...

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February 26, 2019

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